What’s a Terf? The short answer is a hater. If you’ve been on twitter, in feminist circles,you’ve probably seen the term TERF thrown around. It’s time you understood what it means, and then subsequently quit using the term. 

I’ll tell you why. It means Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminist (TERF) and it is used to describe someone who calls themselves a feminist, but who does not support the Trans Community. They exclude them. TERFs do not consider our transgender sisters to be females. They view them as posers who just want to enter our safe spaces and use our bathrooms. (Note: I never knew our bathrooms were really all that great) 

Seems like a heck of a lot of judgement coming from people who dare to call themselves feminists fighting for equality. It is hypocritical and mean and after this explanation of the term for your benefit, we will not use it again. 

So What’s a TERF? In truth they are an anti-trans activist, and that is what we shall call them. 

The word feminist has enough negative connotations on its back without having these sexist, mean, ridiculous, discriminatory group glom on and create more. 

Here’s a link to an article Cosmo did about the topic. 

Patricia Arquette has long been a political equality activist. Her sister Alexis was transgender and sadly died in 2016 from complications from AIDS. She recently spoke of the bravery and courage of Alexis at the 2019 Emmys. If you want to learn more about Alexis here’s a story People Magazine wrote about her. 


There’s a lot about gender we are still discovering. I’m cisgender and try to be open to understanding what is not my experience. Such as, saying your preferred pronouns when you introduce yourself. Maybe I am obviously a female, and people don’t need my terms, but it makes it easier for transpeople to give their pronouns if the rest of us are doing it. Fine with me. What do I care? I just want to honor who people are. I’m she/her. Cisgender males are he/him. 

All you do is say, I’m Jane, preferred pronouns she/her. 

A transgender person might say, I’m Jane, with preferred pronouns they/them. (or they may say he/him or she/her) If you care about respecting that persons pronouns you’ll honor their request. Make an error? Apologize, correct yourself, and keep moving. We are all learning.


Usually about now, people say, but what about sports? Is it “fair” if a transgender who was born male plays in women’s sports and brings their “male” genetics with them and dominates the sport. I really don’t know what is the answer to that question. I know it’s something to think about and when I “get there” I’ll be sure to post about it.

But what I know for sure…. is that right now I’m much more concerned that the lifespan of a Trans person is only 35 years old. It’s time we quit harassing and worrying about sports. Sports we can figure out.  We need to support them. Use their pronouns. Help erase the stigma. They are humans that have already been traumatized. They are our sisters and we should all be fighting for equality together. 

PS: The flag with the faded pink and blue stripes is the transgender flag. Be nice to those who fly it, not everyone is. Make a difference. Stop the hate. 


IN SUMMARY: The word TERF is hateful, because it is exclusionary. To be nestled so close to the word Feminist is unacceptable. Do not use the word TERF. Call them what they are, Anti-Trans Activists (or haters) .